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Latest press release from Ducati:
Owing to the poor results from our latest WSB 1199 Panigale we are requesting that there are some changes to the rules so as to allow us to carry on claiming to be the best sports bike in the world.
1. Kawasaki should have to carry a 10 kg bag of cement on their motorcycles. In fairness we will not dictate the location of the bag. we will leave this up to Kawasaki.
2. Aprilia are blatantly too fast in a straight line so we feel it is fair that they remove one spark plug for the duration of each race. We do not feel this is too severe a restriction.
3. BMW, as everyone knows can't build sport bikes and as this championship is for Ducati and must be won by Ducati we feel that BMW's should be forced to carry panniers and and use knobbly tyres.
4. Honda have long been known for innovation and so as to allow them to continue in this vain we feel that the must be forced to use fully automatic transmissions limited to 3 gears.
5. Suzuki, whilst not being on